Dr. Stone: New World

Episode 9

For this week's episode of Dr. Stone, we could talk about Ginro's arc—how even without his brother physically present to be his conscience, he still knows the right thing to do. We could delve into his psyche and expound upon how he knew from the start that Kohaku was asking him to bring them the mobile lab—that he was just trying to trick both them and himself so he would be able to run away from danger guilt-free. But let's be serious, that's not what we're here for today. No, today is all about the 23rd Annual Cult Leader Harem Beauty Pageant!

Our first contestant this year is Kohaku who has gone with a… unique approach. Clearly aiming to appeal to our Dear Leader's time as a jaggalo in his early youth, she has opted to go for a full-on Heath Ledger's Joker look. Sadly, our Dear Leader now considers his tastes of that time to be part of his “dark history” that is best forgotten. It looks like Kohaku has no chance of being chosen this time around.

Next up we have Amaryllis, the clear front-runner in this year's contest. Opting to go with the traditional, shell-adorned look has only increased her natural beauty. But where she rises above the rest is in her cute and innocent personality—and it looks like our head judge, Minister Ibara agrees.

Our third contestant is a mysterious young woman known only as “S.” While our Dear Leader is known to have had a thing for fit and muscular women, it's the obvious prosthetics that are going to knock her out of the running. Wait… Minister Ibara seems to be examining the prosthetics closely. He's… he's taking a bite out of one! What a surprise! What appeared to be a half-assed attempt at augmenting her natural bust was actually a tasty treat to bribe our head judge! And it seems to have worked. What a clever young woman.

Coming up next is Gin-chan. She looks cute and demure but… what's this? A tomboyish personality!? I have a feeling that Gin-chan here is trying to lose on purpose. There are always a few girls each year who are too “shy” and believe they aren't worthy to join our Dear Leader's harem. Unfortunately for them, Ibara is a seasoned judge and will often choose them out of spite.

Our fifth contestant today is Senku. With a toned body and accessories that match the color of her hair, she's off to a good start. However, the pigtails don't really suit her and the eyeliner is way over-applied. It looks like she won't be getting picked this year—but don't give up! There's always next year Senku!

Moving on to our last contestant—wait, there seems to be a bit of a situation on stage. It looks like our first contestant, Kohaku, is trying to force her way back in for a second chance... Minister Ibara has allowed it. And wow! What a night and day transformation. It seems Amaryllis redid her makeup backstage. What good sportsmanship from a competitor! Ibara seems pleased as well. You better be careful Amaryllis. Looks like someone else is aiming for the number one slave-wife spot!

Finishing off this year's competition, we have Gen—and what a way to end things! While most of our other contestants have gone the pure and innocent route, Gen's vibe is far more elegant and mature. The two-tone hair color and facial tattoo only serve to accentuate her beauty. Moreover, she has chosen to go with non-traditional clothing that shows her figure while concealing her skin. Minister Ibara seems to be impressed as well. He's naming her the winner of the 23rd Annual Cult Leader Harem Beauty Pageant!

But don't worry, none of our contestants will leave empty-handed. All will be escorted by heavily armed guards to our Dear Leader's sex dungeon where they will live out the rest of their days catering to his every carnal desire. What an honor. And with that, we'll see you next year.

Rating:

Random Thoughts:

• All joking aside, I'm getting the feeling that the real “Dear Leader” doesn't exist and Ibara has long since usurped the throne.

• With that in mind, I could have happily lived the rest of my life not knowing Ibara's sexual preferences.

• Suika would be very good at Metal Gear.

• Not gonna lie, I'm tempted to boil some meat and add jasmine tea to see if it really creates a poop smell.

Dr. Stone: New World is currently streaming on Crunchyroll.